Ava Bellows' Top 10 Songs of the year: A Listicle
Here’s a collection of songs that didn’t just define my playlists this year—they felt personal. Each one moved me, challenged me, or stuck with me in ways I can’t shake.
CAPRICORN
BY VAMPIRE WEEKEND
A cosmic meditation on longing and destiny, set against a lush and sprawling arrangement.
This song feels like a warm embrace under an infinite sky. I love how it captures that feeling of searching for something bigger than yourself—something you may never quite find but can’t stop yearning for. The production is lush, almost otherworldly, and there’s something about it that feels deeply humbling yet uplifting all at once.
NOMAD
BY CLAIRO
A gentle exploration of feeling untethered and searching for belonging.
Clairo’s voice is soft and intimate, almost like she’s whispering secrets directly to you. This song feels like wandering aimlessly but finding comfort in the journey itself. It’s wistful and deeply personal, with a fragile honesty that makes you stop and sit with it for a while.
SADNESS AS A GIFT
BY ADRIANNE LENKER
A raw, poetic reflection on finding beauty and meaning in sorrow.
Adrianne Lenker has this way of taking complex emotions and turning them into something simple and sacred. This song feels like permission to embrace sadness, to hold it close and let it teach you something about yourself. It’s intimate and tender, reframing sorrow as something meaningful and transformative.
Labour (the cacophony)
BY PARIS PALOMA
A fiery anthem that channels the weight of societal expectations into rage and liberation.
This song is chaos in the best way—it starts as a simmering frustration and erupts into this raw, unfiltered rage. The layered vocals and relentless buildup perfectly mirror the pressure and exhaustion so many women carry, and the cacophony is cathartic in its release. It feels like a rallying cry and a primal scream all at once.
SO LONg, london
BY TAYLOR SWIFT
A bittersweet goodbye to a city that represents love, loss, and self-discovery.
Taylor Swift has a way of making a place feel like a character, and this song is a perfect example. It’s not just about saying goodbye to London but to a version of herself tied to that city. I love how it mourns not only a relationship but the memories, the hopes, and the pieces of yourself you leave behind when you move on.
NOTHING MATTERS
BY THE LAST DINNER PARTY
A defiant, theatrical anthem about the contradictions of love and nihilism.
This song is so decadent and dramatic—it’s impossible not to be swept up in it. The line “I will fuck you like nothing matters” hits like a revelation, flipping nihilism into a kind of passionate, chaotic freedom. I love the way the ornate production contrasts with the rawness of the lyrics, making it feel like a baroque celebration of throwing caution to the wind and living in the moment.
ALONE
BY THE CURE
A darkly romantic meditation on isolation and the longing to connect.
This song aches with that kind of loneliness you can almost sink into, and I love the way it captures the tension between wanting to be alone and craving connection. It’s brooding and atmospheric, with lyrics that feel like a confession you’ve been holding onto for too long.
HOPE IS A KNIFE
BY MUSTAFA
A haunting exploration of hope as both a salvation and a source of pain.
Mustafa’s voice carries so much weight, and this song feels like a fragile thread between heartbreak and resilience. I love how he frames hope as something sharp— necessary, but dangerous too. It’s a reminder that hope is what keeps us moving forward, even when it hurts.
GIRL, SO CONFUSING feat. lorde
BY CHARLI XCX
A glitchy, chaotic dive into the confusion of identity, desire, and attraction.
This track feels like stepping into someone’s swirling thoughts. The way Charli and Lorde’s voices twist around each other mirrors the messy, disjointed feelings of not knowing how you feel about someone—or yourself. It’s dynamic, experimental, and addictively chaotic, capturing the beauty of not having all the answers.
BLACK ICE
BY MAYA HAWKE
A slow-burning reflection on memory, loss, and the quiet weight of life.
This song feels like a midnight drive with nothing but your thoughts to keep you company. Maya Hawke’s storytelling is so vivid, painting these small, poignant moments that say so much. I love how the song lingers in its quietness, letting its emotions creep in slowly and settle in your chest.
These songs weren’t just background noise —they were experiences. Each one gave me something to feel, something to think about, and something I won’t forget. From catharsis to quiet introspection, they defined my year.
x
Ava Bellows
very laboratory